The Trouble with Fondant, Careless Words and a Gun

 "Gracious words are a honeycomb,
  sweet to the soul and healing to the bones."  Proverbs 16:24




Anyone who knows me knows that I love to bake.  Some of my fondest memories are of waking up on a Saturday morning at my pop's house with the wonderful smell of fresh cinnamon rolls baking.  That smell still makes me miss him.  I love to bake for many reasons... for one, I have a terrible sweet tooth! (having professional bakers for grandparents probably sealed that for me!), but maybe even more than that, I love to bless people and I remember what a blessing my grandparent's wonderful baking was to me.  It showed me they cared, to take the time and effort to make me something amazing, just because they loved me.

Generally I am not a fan of reality shows, but as I was I flipping through the channels Monday night, I starting watching "The Next Great Baker".  The show is a contest to become the next baker at Carlo's Bakery (a really big deal to anyone trying to "make it" in the baking world).  The three contestants that won the challenge got to choose two others to be on their team for an elimination challenge.  One of the men that had won this challenge was so endearing, he was so open, so excited that Buddy liked his desert.  He had such a great quality about him that I was so hoping he did well.  He choose two other guys because he knew that they were really good and said that he could learn from them, he had such a humility about him.  After the whole thing was over, his team did not end up doing well and they were up for elimination.  The two other guys on his team began to say how they had carried the whole thing and how bad his part of the cake had been because of his inexperience with fondant (something they had already known and he had asked if what he had done was acceptable to them).  So, the young man known by his army buddies as "Sergeant Cake", was eliminated, went home to North Carolina and shot himself in the head, leaving a wife and two young children.  The show simply had a "in memory of" mention of him at the end of the show, a quick Goggle search told the rest of the story.


For the past couple of weeks I have been thinking about the power of words and this tragic story just brought it home to me even more.  Why is it that someone gets to the point that life seems so hopeless that suicide seems like a solution?  I am sure it wasn't just the show and the words of his team mates, (I know they had no idea what he was going through and are probably dealing with much pain over the situation themselves) I am sure that there were many things that had piled up, one straw at a time, piling up...  but what WAS the LAST straw?  Was it his service in Iraq, was the rejection more than he could take, did the imperfect fondant and the unkind words break his spirit or was there something else that became that last straw?  I guess we will never know.


How many people do we touch every day that have the weight of the world on their shoulders, that have the straws piling up?  How many broken spirits hiding behind smiling faces have you seen today?  How many need a kind word and the hope of Christ that is in you?

Wise words satisfy like a good meal;
  the right words bring satisfaction.

 The tongue can bring death or life;
  those who love to talk will reap the consequences.  (NLT) Proverbs 18:20-21


  The words of the reckless pierce like swords,
  but the tongue of the wise brings healing."  Proverbs 12:18

Can our words literally bring life or death?  Could our words change a life?  Many years ago I was in a place of desperation and for a moment suicide seemed like a way out of the pain.  I am so thankful that one person, a woman I worked with but did not know very well, saw behind my smile and spoke an encouraging word, it was her words that I remembered when the desperation got so bad that I almost made that horrible decision, and it was her words that kept me from making it.  This situation showed how important words can be - Joan's words literally brought life to me, and how something as simple as encouragement can make the difference to someone in pain.


It is so easy not to notice what others are going through... we all want to but, but we all have very busy lives and sometimes people are very good at hiding the pain inside. I am asking God to make my words words of life, to help me to see, to really see people through His eyes and not my own, to see their pain and to reach out and help them through it - to give them hope that there is a way through it.  I want to hate gossip as much as He does and not to let it be a part of me along with the destruction and pain that goes with it.  I am asking Him to help me to make my words words that bring satisfaction and life to the hearer, to bring hope to the hopeless.  To think before I speak so that my words are a blessing to the hearer, not idle or hurtful.  I want it to be an ever present thought in my mind that my words ARE important!  That we can bless or we can slander and murder with our tongues, a word of gossip or just something that really needs not to be said can bring such destruction when we are careless.  Personally I have spent too many years speaking carelessly, I want to be a blessing, to bring life, growth, health, encouragement to the hearer, to shun gossip and not to speak OR let my ears be another's persons dumping ground - not to even receive an evil report about another, but to love others like God does.  Even when there is conflict with another, my prayer is that my words will be the truth in love, words of peace, His words.


So, today, what will your words be?


   "May the words of my mouth
      and the meditation of my heart
   be pleasing to you,

      O Lord, my rock and my redeemer." Ps 19:14 (NLT)